


Stop staring at me holy shit

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: I Tried, M/M, Ugh, dave pls stop staring, gayyy, he knows, t+ for swearing, this was done quickly ok, wrote it in less than an hour
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-27
Updated: 2015-07-30
Packaged: 2018-03-26 02:58:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3834484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seriously who the fuck are you why are you staring at me</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

What the hell?

Why won’t this _fucker_ stop staring at you? You were just  
trying to write this god damn report, is that too much to ask?

_Oh do NOT pretend you’re not looking at me you fucker those shades  
hide nothing._

You looked over at him once again and he rose an eyebrow.

“Why ya staring at me?” he asked, in possibly the most annoying voice  
you had ever heard. You glared at him.

“I’m not the one staring at you. _You’re_ staring at me. I’m  
just trying to write this fucking report.” You growled at him. The  
corner of his mouth curved up slightly into an annoyingly small smirk.  
This smug asshole thinks he’s better than you, huh?

“Oh no way, I’m not staring at you. I’m just blogging about the cute  
asshole who keeps staring at _me._ ” He said flatly. You groaned  
and saved the progress from your report to the thumb drive you had  
plugged in to the library computer, then proceeded to shut down the  
computer and leave, shooting him another glare as you left.

+++

You walked in to the library and of course, once again, _he_  
was there, sitting at the same table that was closest to the row of  
computers. You sat at your usual computer and plugged in the thumb  
drive. The computer was already on so you launched microsoft office  
word. You hadn’t even gotten two paragraphs done before you most  
definitely felt his gaze on you. You looked out of the corner of your  
eye and saw that, yes, his shades were pointed directly at you and he  
was definitely staring.

“Do you need something?” You snarled, pausing your typing. He looked  
surprised for a moment then shook his head, looking back at his  
computer screen. Just then you got a message from one of your dickweed  
friends. Not that you hated any of them at all, you loved them a lot,  
they were just annoying as all fuck.

 **\--turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]--**  
TG: yo  
CG: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT?  
TG: chill your teets bro just sayin yo  
CG: I WILL NOT “CHILL MY TEETS”.  
CG: UNLESS YOU HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO TELL ME, PLEASE DON’T BOTHER ME.  
CG: IM WORKING ON AN IMPORTANT REPORT.  
TG: seriously bro find your chill  
TG: I was thinking maybe we could meet irl or something  
TG: cuz ya know  
TG: you told me you live close by  
CG: STRIDER I THINK MEETING YOU WOULD JUST ADD TO THE CURRENT STRESS  
OF THIS FUCKING ASSIGNEMENT.  
TG: please  
CG: NOT RIGHT NOW  
CG: ALSO THIS DOUCHE WON’T STOP STARING AT ME I SWEAR TO GOD I AM  
GOING TO SHANK SOMEONE  
TG: idk tell him to stop  
CG: EVERY TIME I CONFRONT HIM ABOUT IT HE SAYS IM THE ONE STARING.  
CG: THOSE STUPID FUCKING SHADES CAN’T HIDE IT I KNOW HE’S LOOKING AT ME.  
CG: HE JUST FUCKING LOOKED AT ME AGAIN HOLY SHIT.  
TG: take his shades  
CG: NOW THAT WOULD BE EXTREMELY RUDE AND UNNECESSARY.  
TG: youre extremely rude and unnecessary.  
CG: SHUT THE FUCK UP.  
CG: I’M GOING TO FINISH THIS REPORT NOW.  
TG: aw ok  
TG: later  
**\--turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist  
[CG]--**

Alright, now you could at least get _some_ decent work done  
without being bothered.


	2. blugh how do write

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> UM  
> Okay i wrote this quickly with no planning whatsoever because i feel like its gone long enough without an update so yeah um here let me dump this shitty chapter onto you (i have no fucking idea how to code pesterlogs ok the most i can do is **bold** and _italic_
> 
> also dave POV

**turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]**

TG: yo   
TG: are you done yet  
CG: NO. GO AWAY.  
TG: come the fuck on how long does it take you to finish one report  
TG: forever, apparently  
CG: SHUT THE FUCK UP, IT'S NOT LIKE YOU EVER EVEN TRY ON REPORTS ANYWAY.   
CG: I BET YOU BULLSHIT ALL OF THEM WHILE LISTENING TO THE HIGHSCHOOL MUSICAL SOUNDTRACK.  
TG: oh shit vantas you figured me out  
TG: thats exactly what i do  
TG: last night it was "bet on it" on repeat for my hystory thing   
CG: WAIT ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS  
TG: uh yeah obviously  
CG: WOW YOU ARE SO FUCKING LAME.  
TG: nah bro im the coolest of cool  
CG: NO YOU'RE NOT.  
CG: YOU'RE A FUCKING LOSER> I'M THE COOLEST.  
TG: obviously not  
TG: you dont even know how to identify the cool  
TG: you cant tell when you see it  
TG: or  
TG: read it i guess  
TG: speaking of which hurry the fuck up i want to meet you irl  
CG: JESUS CHRIST YOU NEVER FUCKING STOP TYPING.  
CG: SERIOUSLY YOU NEVER KNOW YOU COULD BE SOME CREEPY AS FUCK THIRTY-YEAR-OLD MAN WHO STILL LIVES IN HIS MOMS BASEMENT AND IS LYING TO ME ABOUT BEING IN HIGHSCHOOL.   
TG; no way bro  
TG: and then again that possibility extends to you too man  
TG: for all i know _you_ could be some creepy old dude  
CG: EW NO.  
CG: NOW FUCK OFF SO I CAN FINISH THIS GOD DAMN REPORT.  
TG: fine dude find your chill  
TG: serioulsy youre so fucking uptight all the time  
CG: WHATEVER. FUCK OFF.  
TG:eh later i guess

**turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]**

At this point really, you were one-hundred-percent sure this angry dude at the computer was Karkat, aka carcinogeneticist. Just, you were waiting to see how long it would take for him to figure out that you were turntechGodhead. Really it should be obvious, what with the rad as fuck appearance and all the red. Also you were pretty sure at one point you told him you wore shades. Serioulsy, he had to be smart enough to realize this shit. Come on karkles. currently he was typing away angrily at his keyboard, working on his report if what he said was true. 

okay Kaarkat hurry the fuck up and finish your report.


	3. okokok

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> aahahahahha filler but also little bit of plot? probably not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear to fucking god every time i walk to the computer lab to type this shit up I'm going to fucking die ok due to layer upon layer upon layer of shirts and shit like  
> I have my binder, and a relatively tight tank-top to keep my binder from sticking up, a shirt, and two hoodies, as well as usually somewhat thick jeans.  
> And it's summer.  
> So for now I'm using my tablet for updates  
> Anyways apologies for lazy chapter cuz at this point I'm just stalling, but I swear I started writing chapter four by now.  
> Anyway this is just a filler chapter so its hellaaaaaa short

_jesus dude i swear you have a staring problem._  
Oh, so now he's resorting to leaving notes at this computer before you even got there? And he's _still_ accusing __

You turned to his tabled and glared, whispering in a harsh tone  
"You're the one with a staring problem."


	4. They meet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Woo

You sat anxiously in the fiction section of the library, messing with the ends of your sweater sleeves to distract from how nervous you were about meeting your best friend for the first time. What if he really was an old fucker though? That would be really gross and creepy? 

You stood up, deciding to read or something while you waited for "turntechGodhead" to message you. He said he'd tell you when he got there.  
You picked out a random book and sat back down to read it, despite not having much interest in the fiction genre. You flipped through the pages and snarled in disgust at the terrible plot, ignoring the glares from the people around you because   
Uh  
You're not supposed to snarl in a library?

Pretty soon you found yourself pretty tired, and rested your head on your arms on the table. Eventually somehow you fell asleep which really was fucking stupid and you shouldn't have done it because it's a library Karkat we've been over this stop being fucking stupid. 

×××

~earlier~

**CG: OKAY BUT HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING TO FIND ME?**   
**TG: trust me karkles ill just know its you**   
**CG: NOT SURE HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THAT.**   
**TG: whatever man**   
**TG: ill message you when I get there**

~ok done with earlier thing~  
~also POV switch lol~

You walked up to the place you and Karkat had agreed to meet. You looked around until finally spotting a table with a mass of messy, unkept hair that most definitely belongs to a sleeping Karkat. You walked to the table and sat across from him, deciding to mess with his hair to see how long it took to wake him up. 

Not long, apparently.   
He sat up quickly and it seemed to take a second to register what was in front of him.  
He looked pretty angry.

"Who the _fuck_ are you?! Why are you touching my hair!? I don't know you!? What are you doing!?" He moved back quickly, backing his chair far from the table.

"Wow, Vantas, what a way to greet your best friend for the first time."

"I- what? Oh. Oh no _fucking_ way." Yeah he was really fucking pissed.   
"You knew it was me the _entire_ fucking time? And you didn't say a god damn thing?" 

"What can I say, CG, I wanted to be 100% sure it was you." 

"Thats- I- You're- You fucking _asshole!_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol I can't write :^^^^^^)


	5. (AUTHORS UPDATE)

Aaaaaaaaaaaaa I am so sorry about pretty much never updating. I would say my writers block is as bad as always, but it's a bit worse. Once I have the motivation to write again, I promise to upload another chapter. Again, I am so sorry!!


End file.
